Things are really heating up now! Jalapeño pepper vodka

This week, we've decided to try something a little different: a jalapeño pepper vodka infusion. The Mad Scienticians are big fans of spicy foods; in fact, behind ethyl alcohol and caffeine, capsaicin is our third favorite molecule.

That said, I am a little intimidated by this experiment. Many of our previous infusions have provided mild or sweet flavors to neutralize the kick of the vodka. Jalapeños, on the other hand, are celebrated for their own bite. Will the combination of these two ingredients create a spicy but otherwise neutral shot, or will they combine their powers to create a higher evil than they could separately? Only experimentation will tell.

We began by rinsing two jalapeño peppers and slicing them in half. Some would say to leave them whole; we say, where's the fun in that? Let's heat this bad boy up.



Much like the recent spearmint vodka experiment, this one was fairly straightforward. Once cut in half, we poured the vodka over the peppers.



Interestingly, the bottoms of the peppers sank to the bottom, while the tops floated. It seems that the stems are more buoyant than the rest of the jalapeño.



We're going to give this a few days and see what happens.

When Citrus Attacks: Lime vodka infusion results

After five days of infusion, the lime vodka experiment was ready to be tested. We debuted the vodka at a party at our laboratory on Saturday night. Our loyal comrades Matt and Jason, who some readers may remember from our New Year's Eve party, agreed to forgive that experience and assist us once again. We took care to perform the test early in the evening this time, to minimize (but not eliminate) intoxication bias.

First, Wayland and I carefully strained four shots' worth of vodka through a coffee filter. Though we sometimes skip this step in the initial test, it was absolutely essential in this case, due to the loose lime zest present in the vodka.





The four shots strained, poured and distributed, we made a brief toast to fallen comrades.



With that, we tipped the shots back and drank them.



The initial taste is very sour, hence Wayland's reaction. "It captured the flavor well, he said. "But the sourness was overwhelming."

Once the sourness abated, I found the taste to be quite nice. There's hardly any vodka taste at all; it's much like taking a bite out of an actual lime. The sourness makes it inadvisable as a straight shot, unless you really like sour things, but I think it will make an excellent mixer.

"Very, very limey," Jason described it. "It needs to be added to something sweet to cut the sour."

We did not make a cocktail using the lime-infused vodka that night, but we will experiment with it during the week and post an example later. Also, we will begin our next experiment tonight, and post its introduction tomorrow.

Coconut vodka status update

A few days ago, we tasted the ongoing coconut vodka infusion for the first time. We entered this experiment blindly, not knowing how long it would take, but we suspected that it would be a while. We consider these suspicions confirmed.

As you can see, some of the coconut particulates give the vodka a swirling white appearance, but for the most part the vodka still looks like vodka.



Wayland tried the first sample and was underwhelmed.



"You get a hint of the coconut flavor," he said, "but overall a pretty bland experience right now."

I sampled the vodka next.



I have to concur with Wayland; you can almost taste the coconut, but at this point -- two weeks into the infusion -- it still tastes mostly like vodka. We added a spoonful of sugar, hoping it will help set the infusion, and will continue to sample it periodically.

Minty-fresh booze: results of spearmint infused vodka

We sampled our mint infusion five days into the experiment, a day longer than we originally intended, due to circumstances beyond our experimental controls. Here's what it looked like before bottling:



By the way, we'd like to thank everyone who commented, both locally and on our LiveJournal feed, to help us determine whether the mint we used is spearmint or peppermint. Though a true consensus was not reached, we are operating under the assumption that it was indeed spearmint.

I wasn't looking forward to this sampling. The extra day of infusion only compounded my fears that the vodka would end up tasting like toothpaste. I prepared the first sample, swigged it back, and swiftly spat it out into the sink.



"Oh, God, that's horrible!" I declared, once my mouth regained functionality. "Your turn."

Wayland took several minutes to get his composure, without complete success; by the time he took his shot, he was still laughing at my misfortune.



Worse yet, he liked it! He said that the initial taste is a bit rough, but the back end was much better, releasing a whiff of freshness in the aftertaste. I tried it again, but again had to spit it out. I just couldn't stand the front end long enough to get to the good part.

And Wayland was smug about it, too.



It's possible that particulates were present in the samples, since we did not filter it until afterward. I don't believe there were any large enough to make a significant impact on the test, though. More than likely, it simply sat too long, though my initial fears may have also introduced bias to my evaluation.



At this point it was time to create a cocktail using the spearmint vodka, which was named with ultimate creativity.

Mint Chocolate Cream

Ingredients:
1-1/3 oz. Mad Scientician™ spearmint vodka
1-1/3 oz. Crème de Cacao
1-1/3 oz. Irish Cream

I didn't find the flavor of the mint vodka offensive in this drink; it was much more subdued. It simply... wasn't anything special.



Look closely into my eyes and you will see that I am not amused. YOU ARE WASTING MY TIME, DRINK.



Wayland's take on the drink was similar to that of the shot; it was only notable on the back end. At first, it's just a chocolate and cream drink; then the mint makes an appearance, but it's not the breath of fresh air he experienced after the straight vodka. In this diluted form, he described the mint as "an afterthought."



Brendan's score: 2 flasks out of 5
Wayland's score: 3.5 flasks out of 5
Overall score:

This week's experiment: Lime infused vodka

Today, we are introducing our latest experiment, lime vodka. Tomorrow, we will post the results of our mint-infused vodka experiment, and the first sampling of the coconut vodka.

First, however, we must report an unfortunate occurrence involving Wayland's lab coat. During an attempt to create a squid-infused vodka, Wayland was wrestling with a live squid in order to subdue it. Unfortunately, despite the superhuman strength he attained by questionably legal means during our coconut experiment, Wayland lost the struggle, due to the squid's defensive use of ink spray. As a result, Wayland's coat became permanently stained with squid ink.



After this embarrassing incident, we decided to base our next experiment on something that could not fight back -- or so we thought.

On the suggestion of several of our readers after our orange vodka infusion, we invested in a basic citrus zester. This was our first attempt at using the zester. Alas, it did not go well. There's a saying in the military, "You have to be at least 10% smarter than the piece of equipment you're working with." It seems that, despite my scientifical background, I didn't meet this qualification.



The zester simply slipped right off of the lime, leaving shallow grooves but not separating any usable zest. In the process, I nearly zested my index finger instead. Yowie!

It was at this point that Wayland had a brainstorm. We already have a piece of lab equipment that is much more effective than this dinky zester. He reached into the cupboard and pulled out the cheese grater.



This led to a much easier, faster and less painful zesting process. We zested two limes, each yielding a reasonable amount of zest.



We then sliced the remainder of the fruits, separating the pith and keeping the "meat" of the limes.



You can tell a lot about both of us by the way we went about this process. I carefully cut around the meat, attempting to cut away all of the pith without losing any pulp. The process was not entirely successful, and frankly, a pain in the ass.



Wayland, on the other hand, cut off the edges of each slice in four strokes, leaving a square slice and sacrificing some of the fruit, but finishing much more quickly and easily.



Finally, we discarded the pith, and tossed the zest, fruit, and filtered vodka into a jar. The loose zest provides a nifty snowglobe effect, simulating the green snow that will fall during the coming nuclear winter.



SHAKE, SNOWGLOBE! SNOW FOR MY ENTERTAINMENT!



We plan on letting the lime infuse for 4-5 days, about the same amount of time as the orange vodka.

Our first real trainwreck

Oddly enough, the first batch of infused vodka that both Mad Scienticians agreed was universally bad was not a new experiment, but a repeat. Our initial attempt at strawberry vodka, completed a month ago, was a resounding success; it was so good, in fact, that the bottle was consumed faster than any other thus far.

When we set out to replenish our supply, however, we made two fatal errors. We used strawberries that were not quite at their prime, and we inadvertently used about two-thirds as many as with the first batch. As a result, the product proved undrinkable.

We disposed of the unfortunate vodka in a small, tearful ceremony in the lab. An MP3 of "Taps" was played in the next room.



Worry not, however; this solitary incident has not weakened our resolve. We intend to repeat this experiment yet again this weekend, after acquiring fresh strawberries.

Pineapple vodka results

We sampled the pineapple vodka last week, and believed it to be ready for bottling, but we were delayed in bottling it and testing it in a cocktail due to Wayland coming down with the flu. Fortunately, the extra infusion time has served to make the pineapple flavor more pronounced.

There was a degree of give-and-take in this infusion, as the pineapple itself soaked up a great deal of vodka, causing the pieces to expand to nearly double their original size. (Please note that this is an estimate based on memory, not precise measurement.)



We filtered the vodka through cheesecloth to remove pulp and other particulates as we bottled it.



Unlike any of our previous experiments, the pineapple vodka hardly changed color as a result of the infusion; only a vague yellow tint is visible.



We gave the vodka another round of sampling to see what difference the additional time made. We were quite pleased with the results. When it first enters your mouth, the initial taste is still mostly vodka, but it is mild and subsides almost instantly. In its place, only pineapple remains, subtle but distinct.





Sadly, this is the best reaction photo of me that we could get, despite my drinking three samples for the purpose. (Work, work, work...)

Wayland volunteered to taste the pineapple chunks this time. Apparently, they were even more horrid than the strawberry slices from that experiment. The pineapple had given up all its flavor to the vodka, and absorbed a great deal of vodka in return.





The initial sampling completed, there was only one task remaining: testing the infusion in a cocktail. Since we're sure everyone was expecting us to create another tropical-style drink, we decided to do something else entirely.

Pineapple Bull

Over ice, pour:
2 oz. Mad Scientician™ pineapple vodka
4 oz. Red Bull



We were surprised at how underwhelming this drink turned out. Not only did the pineapple flavor hardly show up, the flavors of the pineapple vodka and Red Bull seemed to cancel each other out, leaving a nearly flavor-neutral drink.



You see, I am shocked and appalled at the lack of flavor! Or perhaps I need to train myself not to exhale so hard when I drink, at least when photos are being taken.

Brendan's score: 2 flasks out of 5
Wayland's score: 3.5 flasks out of 5
Overall score: